I know I do a lot things that may not make sense. Just in the last month I adopted a dog out of a moment of weakness that has brought our total to 3, I buried a squirrel to calm down my animal loving daughter, and tonight I outdid myself. I took 3 kids to the mall. Three kids ages 6, 8, and 10. Believe me when I say it would have been easier if they were all still stroller size!!My only reason for going to the mall was I wanted to get a UK shirt to wear to the game Saturday. I parked at the closest entrance to the store I wanted to go in and thought it would be an easy peasy trip. I obviously need to quit thinking.
What is it about walking through the doors of the mall that is like entering the gates of hell? It was hot as balls in that place and I swear they do it on purpose. We barely made it in the door when suddenly 2 out of 3 kids suddenly became so thirsty you would have thought they had crossed the desert. My nephew started speaking as if he had a scratchy throat to prove his point. I called bullshit on that one because him and my daughter talked nonstop in the car and trust me, there was not a voice issue. Anyway, we made our way to the nearest water fountain because the last thing I wanted to do was try to deal with 3 kids with Cokes walking through the mall.
Once the kids drank enough water to hold over a camel we made our way through the mall. As we walked past Justice I saw Natalie get the glazed over look in her eye from all the sparkles and sequins and knew we would have to go in. Joshua actually gagged at the thought of going in the "girl store" . Here he is, standing in front of the entrance, acting like I had just asked him to scoop dog poop out of the yard with his bare hands. My nerves were unraveling at a very fast pace.
Just to fast forward through the rest of our adventure in one hour we had: 2 bathroom breaks, 1 water fountain stop, 1 stop for Cokes because I was informed water fountain water was disgusting(and I have to agree), 1 trip to the Disney store that makes me hate all things related to the mouse, a stop at the cookie counter because nothing grabs a kid's attention like a display case of baked goodness with sprinkles and finally we head back to the car all the while my nephew is complaining his feet hurt because the mall is too big to walk around! Screw the cookies, mama wants a drink!!
I do however consider this to be a successful trip as I left the mall with just as many kids as I entered with, I bought 2 new UK t shirts and most importantly, I did not flip my shit and get dragged away in a straitjacket. This record will stand for years because I am in no hurry to try and best it ;)
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