A few days ago I got brave and got over my fear of looking like big headed Charlie Brown and chopped my hair off into a pixie. I freaking love it. It makes me feel like a fucking rock star. Aside from my ears freezing I've felt pretty damn good about how it looks.
And then my kid almost ruins it.
We're driving down the road, Joshua's sitting behind me. Out of the blue he says " Mommy, from the back your hair looks like a soccer mom. But the front makes you look totally pretty."
What the hell?!?! A soccer mom??
Technically, I am a soccer mom, I have a kid who plays soccer. But I don't look like one! I don't wear mom jeans that are belted up to my boobs with my shirt tucked in down to my knees! I don't drive a minivan! I've always been super proud of the changes I make with my hair and this little observation stung a bit. The quickly added "the front makes you pretty" didn't help.
I need to have a long talk with my son about "things you don't say to women". Number one-NEVER tell her she looks fat, even is she asks and number two-Never tell her that her rocking new haircut makes her look like a soccer mom. If the boy doesn't start learning these lessons now I foresee a dateless future ahead of him.
In the meantime I'm going to dye my hair hot pink and get some visible tattoos and hope the "soccer mom" label washes off.
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