When I was pregnant with our second child and we found out we were having a girl, I was elated. It wasn't because I felt we needed a girl to complete our family. My husband and I would have been happy with two boys. I was excited for her because I always wanted a big brother. As the oldest with two younger sisters I used to dream of having an older brother who would be my protector. Natalie was going to be a very lucky girl because Joshua was going to be an awesome big brother.
He was never jealous of her, not for a minute. While I was pregnant I would touch my belly and tell Joshua that inside was his baby. She was always his baby. He called her "Natty Bit Bit" because at two years old Natalie Elizabeth was quite the mouthful. He was always ready to bring a bottle or a toy to her if she cried. He loved to snuggle and give her kisses. Joshua was great at taking care of his little sister. As they grew up it became clear that Natalie would help take care of Joshua.
Natalie never knew anything was different because to her Joshua was just "Joshie". Sure he did things that might be odd but she didn't see them that way because he had always done them. Things really changed when Joshua was in the third grade and Natalie was in first. Third grade was by far the worst year for him because that is when the bullying began. He would cry in the morning when he had to get out of the car, and he would cry every night that he didn't want to go back the next day. The time came when we had to sit down with Natalie and explain what Autism meant and what it meant for her as Joshua's sister.
We told her that some kids are really cruel and they think it's funny to tease kids who are different. Natalie is a sensitive kid, but she is tough as nails. She won't stand for anyone to get picked on. We told her she needed to look out for her big brother. If she saw him getting teased or bullied it was her job to find a grown up who could help. She even had our full permission to clobber anyone who was being mean to him. She maybe had one or two questions and that was it. She nodded her head, said ok, and I could tell from the look in her eyes that she would take her new job very seriously. I'm sure that to some degree Natalie knew what to do before we even told her. They are just that close.
It has been two years since that conversation and as Joshua gets older he is beginning to take up for himself more. Natalie is never too far behind, ready to go if needed. I am so thankful for the bond they share. As long as Joshie and Natty Bit Bit have each other, everything will be fine.
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